oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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