Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
