bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
