this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
operation harelip BJ is a go
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
