Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
