is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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