You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
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