The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
