I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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