For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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