i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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