I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
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