"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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