was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Banned from zoo.
Again?
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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