wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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