I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
