she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
