ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
