That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Randomize
