Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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