Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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