What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Randomize