He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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