yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Randomize
