I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
