If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
