Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
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