So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives�
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
