I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Randomize
