Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
