PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
