Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
