Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I pour the whiskey from now on
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Randomize
