dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
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