If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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