If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
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