hell yes lets make some ravioli
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
