Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize
