the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize
