"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
