**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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