dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
