there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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