He told me they were just razor bumps!
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize