don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Randomize
