Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Randomize
