did you get engaged???
We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Randomize
