dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
