His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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