yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
